Joke - SMART WOMAN

There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife,
"When I die. I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me."

And so he got his wife to promise him with all her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him

Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket; his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.

When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!"

She had a box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and then rolled it away.

So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren't fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband."

The loyal wife replied, "Listen, I'm a Christian, I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that casket with him."

"You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?"

"I sure did" said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a cheque. If he cash it, he can spend it."

Jokes - COFFEE

Coffee

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife : "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."

The husband : "You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

The wife : "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
The husband : "I can't believe that, show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him the top of several pages, that it indeed says....

"HEBREWS"

Be Careful of Your Thoughts

· Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words

· Be careful of your words, for your words become your deeds

· Be careful of your deeds, for your deeds become your habits

· Be careful of your habits, for your habits become your character

· Be careful of your character, for your character becomes your destiny

famous qoute by Paulette Francesca Sedgwick

DON'T QUIT

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit

Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

Useful Life Advice

The most destructive habit = Worry

The greatest Joy = Giving

The greatest loss = Loss of self-respect

The most satisfying work = Helping others

The ugliest personality trait = Selfishness

The most endangered species = Dedicated leaders

Our greatest natural resource = Our youth

The greatest "shot in the arm" = Encouragement

The greatest problem to overcome = Fear

The most effective sleeping pill = Peace of mind

The most crippling failure disease = Excuses

The most powerful force in life = Love

The most dangerous pariah = A gossiper

The world's most incredible computer = The brain

The worst thing to be without = Hope

The deadliest weapon = The tongue

The two most power-filled words = "I Can"

The greatest asset = Faith

The most worthless emotion = Self-pity

The most beautiful attire = SMILE!

The most prized possession = Integrity

The most powerful channel of communication = Prayer

The most contagious spirit = Enthusiasm